Today was the first day back at school, and although the kids don’t come back until Monday, I’m exhausted. Part of it is information overload from all the start up handouts, procedures, and protocol I listened to today, but the biggest part of the problem for me is the early morning. Hauling my sorry carcass out of my comfy bed this morning was a difficult process; there may have been cussing involved.

This transition from the summertime get up when I feel like getting up business to being at school around 8:10 is a pretty jagged shift. No matter how early I go to bed, I never feel properly rested if I have to wake up before 9 a.m. Today, that alarm was particularly painful. For some dumb reason, my alarm clock has a third setting after blaring beep and roaring radio; crazy ocean birds. It’s more than just the birds, really, but the birds are my favourite part. At the beginning, there are ocean sounds, like the whistle of the sea wind, followed by the splashes of waves and the cries of gulls. If I let it play long enough before I hit “snooze” (again) I also get to hear the peaceful blasts of a foghorn. Yes, a great honking foghorn.

I understand the appeal of the ocean sounds. Waves and wind are very soothing, and certainly a much better way to start the day than a beeping alarm clock; a person could almost herself waking up on a fabulous island holiday with that kind of alarm. Let’s start the day with a pineapple juice on the lanai, shall we? I hate morning radio shows that discuss the weather, road construction, and last night’s episode of (ugh) The Bachelor, so the sea birds still make some sense to me.

The alarm clock and I stop agreeing at the foghorn. On what planet is a foghorn relaxing? It’s a like prairie sounds alarm clock, with little songbirds tweeting in the background, perhaps a trickling creek, and the gentle rustle of late summer grass. Suddenly, the drowsy person is startled out of slumber by the trumpet of a CN train. You know, because it’s hauling wheat across the prairies; it’s thematically appropriate. That train honking makes just as much sense as the foghorn I contend with every morning.

One of these days, I’m going to have one of those half-asleep dreams about stepping into traffic and into the path of an oncoming truck, which honks with gusto. I’m surprised it hasn’t happened already.

Today was definitely the worst “wake up” I’ll deal with for quite some time. I’m looking forward to the mornings being a little bit better with each day, not that I’ll be bounding out of bed in when I hear the foghorns, but at least I won’t be so tempted to throw myself into the ocean.

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