Remember when I described the differences between my work Christmas parties and The Electrician’s? Remember how I described the women in low-cut dresses and push-em-up bras taking their puppies for an evening stroll at a company event? Yeah. That happened again last night at my sweetie’s holiday dinner and dance. Last night, though, I saw something to top everything from last year.
There was a woman with no shirt.
Yes, you read that correctly. Behind us in line at the bar was a young couple, and the man was dressed very nicely in a shirt and tie. The woman was wearing a very mini skirt, heels, and no shirt. I should interrupt your mental images here to note that she was wearing a snug-fitting suit jacket, the kind a person wears with a dress shirt or maybe a camisole if she’s feeling a little bit racy, with the first button about level with her navel and nothing but self-tanner underneath.
This was not a jacket that was nearly closed with the buttons done up. Put your right hand on your chest with your thumb extended so your thumb rests on your collar bone. Note the distance from your fingertips to the base of your hand where it joins up with your wrist. Quite a ways, right? That’s about the width of the cleavage this girl was rocking last night, a gap that ran most of the length of her torso.
Now, I’m no prude. I see no issue with a person flaunting her best features. This young lady’s assets were not as much flaunted as they were one sharp sneeze from being fully displayed. I’m quite certain there was double-sided tape involved in her ensemble, as well as a great deal of faith in that tape. It was also clear that, much like the festively decorated banquet hall, her ornaments were artificial, but I am still rather boggled at how a woman could dress like that for a work party.
Jiggle Bells indeed.
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